Love Letter and Guys Who Read are Hot!

Last Monday, Michael and I stopped by our friend's house to pick something up. I waited in the car while Michael ran in. As I waited, I noticed that Michael had left his wallet in the car, so I decided to rifle through it for cash, and then anything else of value. No cash, but I did find something of greater value than any amount of money could give me. Tucked away into a hidden pocket of his wallet were some little love notes that I had written Michael before his mission. He had taped them together side by side, and at the bottom was a quote from Pres. Hinckley. "Choose a companion of your own faith, choose a companion you can always honor, you can always respect, one whom will compliment you in your own life, one to whom you can give your entire heart, your entire love, your entire allegiance, your entire loyalty." He carried those letters, and this quote around with him during his mission. It is hard to describe the amount of love I have for Michael. Sometimes I feel so much love for him that I can't help but just grab him and hug him!

Besides being in love with him, he makes me laugh. For the past week or so, Michael has been wanting to read The Hunger Games. Now, I have never in my life known Michael to be a reader. Don't get me wrong, he is very intelligent, but sitting down with a book is not his cup of tea, unless it is a user manual to the latest and greatest electronic gadget, or stereo component. So not wanting to crush his latest request by laughing and saying "are you for real?", we went and purchased the book. When we got home he wanted to read right after dinner, so after he ate, he climbed into bed with his book and started to read. Before I woke up from this dream, I had to take a picture for proof...aren't guys who read just so hot!

I am a Xenophobe...

...have been my whole life. Flashbacks to my childhood confirm the diagnosis.
As a kid, I never liked loud noises. Birthday parties were a nightmare for me when the host parent would announce that we were going to have a balloon popping race. Dread would set in. I hated the surprise of a loud, obnoxious noise that would startle me.
The 4th of July was another stressful time for me as a kid. Fireworks, parade gun shooting, parade canon, etc. I hated them all. I remember getting so paranoid an anxious at the parade before the canon would come. It was so bad that I hid in the Port-a-Potty, or under my dad's chair. Sad right?
Today I even think of the worst case scenario in most situations that I am in. I always look for what is unsafe about the activity before I even think of enjoying it. 
Last night I went shooting with Michael. I made him give up his new, high quality pair of shooting earmuffs that he has never used so that the loud noises wouldn't bother me. I wore earplugs first, and then the muffs...and when the shotgun came out, I got into the car...still with the muffs and plugs in.
To this day I won't go to a haunted house simply because I have learned not to cause myself undue stress and anxiety. Yes, I am a bum during the Halloween season, but I just don't see the benefit of paying for someone to startle me to the point of terror and possibly wetting myself.
I asked myself if maybe it was just a fear of loud noises, but really, my fear lies in the unknown. I like having a set plan, I like being safe, I like knowing what to expect. I like things to work out how I plan them. It's too bad that life isn't like that...especially once you get married...to a Rawle boy.
Last night, my sister-in-law Corinne was kind enough to sit in the car with me while the boys were shooting the shotgun. I felt like a tool asking her, seeing as she wasn't really afraid of the loud noise like I was, but she went with me. While sitting in the car, I watched as her husband and my husband shot that gun with huge smiles on their faces. They didn't have a care in the world. Thinking back on being a witness to what I thought then was silliness edging on stupidity makes me realize that had I not experienced those noises, and the guns themselves, I would still be fearing them. Michael has proper gun etiquette, he wouldn't do anything stupid, so why did I need to fear the noise and the weapon so much? I know why. I watch too many crime scene dramas. I need a break.
Back to marrying one of those Rawle boys. Every "dangerous" thing that I have been a part of has been with Michael. I have even been in a few crashes since knowing him...four-wheeler, motorcycle, long board, etc. But I never would have experienced the joy that all of those things brought had I not tried them. I am still here today though, and it is because Michael is careful, not stupid, and looks after himself and me in every situation.
He is the cure to my xenophobia...I just hope he doesn't make me try rock climbing, hang gliding, skiing, snowboarding, sky diving, sailing, horseback riding, downhill mountain biking and anything else that could potentially be dangerous.

My Big Mike

I just got back from seeing the movie "Blindside"...and I cried all the way through it. It was such a good movie! When I first heard that they called Michael Oher, "Big Mike", it made me think of the time that I called my own husband, Big Mike. He was commenting on Facebook that he would like to be one of Robin Hood's merry men, and I asked him if he would be Big Mike...you know, Little John...Big Mike, it seemed to fit. Anyway, after seeing the movie, and feeling inspired and full of love, I decided to dedicate this post to my Big Mike.
I love Michael with all my heart. He works so hard for our family, makes sure that we are taken care of, and even when money is tight, he always gives me just a little bit of my own to spend on what I want. He gets up every morning, takes the dog out, and then makes my lunch. He gets home after a long day, and helps me make dinner. He helps keep the house clean, helps motivate me when I don't want to do anymore, and always makes me laugh. He always opens the door for me, lets me go first, gives me his pocket change, and if there is only a little bit of ice cream left, he lets me have that too. I love my Big Mike. In so many more ways than I can write.